An Accidental Question
by ALargeBear
Summary: Dia never understood Chika as well as she hoped, but she could never bring herself to ask. At least, until an odd afternoon in the student council room.


"You know, I've never understood what you meant when you said you wanted to shine?"

Dia sat with usual confidence behind a mound of student council paperwork. Each form filled out with practiced precision. Used to a serene silence as she worked, and not being alone was strange. Kanan and Mari were the usual guests, helping with a paper here and there, not Chika, and talking to Chika was always much harder then it had any right to be. She regretted the question as soon as it was blurted.

"Huh?" Chika shook and tilted her head from her seat to Dia's side.

Trying to ignore it, Dia kept working. Scribbling on some budget request that she couldn't read through the embarrassment. A question she'd always kept to herself when thinking about Chika. Something she did far to often, Mari made sure to remind her of that fact.

"Dia." Chika poked her shoulder. "You asked me something, didn't you?"

A quick glance up to Chika's eyes was a mistake. Dia could keep a semblance of composure on her face, practice made perfect after all, but internal walls cracked. There wouldn't be much work getting done anymore as she tried, but failed, to refocus on the stacks of paper and pen in her hand.

"Diaaaaa." Chika pushed at Dia's side, moving her face in closer with nothing but pure, childish curiosity. "I know you said something. Stop ignoring me."

"I'm trying to work, Chika." Dia shirked away, unsteady hands failing to look busy.

"But you aren't even writing anything." Chika looked from the pen in Dia's hand back up to her eyes.."Please tell me."

"You won't get any work done if I don't tell you, will you?" Dia asked.

Chika answered with a fast shake of the head and bright smile that didn't fit at all with the answer.

Dia hesitated, hoping that Chika would forget about it all and go back to work. It, of course, didn't work. In an attempt to keep long-held feelings in check, Dia took deep breaths. She couldn't dare glance at Chika's face, knowing that sight would be enough to clam up any confidence she mustered. This would have to be handled carefully, and she didn't trust herself to do that. That was a thought that scared her.

"I said." Dia looked for a final way out, Chika's invasive stare offered none. "I've never understood what you mean when you say you want to shine."

"That's a weird question." Chika tilted her head, voice losing a hint of cheer. "Isn't it obvious what shinning means?"

"I wouldn't have asked if it were." Dia rolled the pen in her hand back and forth. "I get wanting to be as bright as Muse, they are the school idol group everyone looks up to after all, but I've always heard you say you want to shine with Aqours, and I don't get it."

It was out in the open, and Dia feared it was too much poking and prodding. Chika was quiet about herself for someone so loud, and she wondered if this questioning were a bridge too far. And immediate dismissal crawled up Dia's throat but was given no time to vocalize as Chika spoke back up.

"I've always been plain old Chika, but school idols are amazing, bright, and made me feel like I could do anything. They make people so happy." Chika scratched the back of her neck and gnawed on her lower lip. "I wanted to do that. You know, make people happy and smile with Aqours. That's why I dragged everyone into this with me."

There was silence as Dia processed. The answer was what she had come to expect. Chika never did make much an effort to hide where this drive came from, but this was only the surface. The arm's length that Chika kept everyone but a privileged few at, and Dia would never admit to being jealous of Riko or You for that, but she wouldn't stop. The confidence had been found to push this far, stopping now would only make sure progress would never be made again.

Dia cleared her throat, breaking the silence. "Do you think Aqours has shined like you hoped?"

Chika opened her mouth but closed it after as she leaned back in her chair, taking a moment to think before continuing. "I think Aqours is amazing and the group makes people all over Japan smile. We might not be the best, but we try as hard as we can. It's because of you and everyone else in the group that we sparkle like this. So yup, Aqours shines really really bright."

"I agree." Dia looked over to the quiet, soft-smiling Chika. She'd seen it maybe once or twice before, but never so close. It was as if Chika believed everything she was saying about a group she lead but didn't take any part of it for herself. "Aqours has become an idol group that anyone could look up to, and we have you to thank for most of that."

Regret, that was all Dia felt as Chika shirked back into herself. A want to reach out and comfort that she would never act took hold as things got quiet again. This time a stiff air filled the void between them as Dia's stomach churned and twisted. It was hard to get a read on what Chika felt, but the way her shoulders shook and the forlorn stare at the table meant Dia prodded much too far. She regretted asking, but the need for Chika to understand her role in all of this took precedence over anything else.

"No. No. No." Chika shook her head. "Yeah, it was my dumb idea in the first place, but I didn't do anything special. Anyone could have had the idea to form an idol group. You even did it with Mari and Kanan in your first year so it's not like I had some amazing plan or anything like that."

Dia's regret festered into anger as Chika went on. "And look at how that turned out. We almost ruined our friendship forever until you came along."

Chika's eyes widened. "Yeah, but you guys would have worked it out."

"Kanan wouldn't even look at me or Mari." Dia bit her lip to keep frustrations back. The self-deprecation from someone clearly amazing could only be tolerated for so long. "If you hadn't come along with Aqours, I don't know where we would be right now. So I don't ever want to hear you say you didn't do anything ever again. Nobody could have done that but you, the shining leader of our little group. Even if you don't see it in yourself."

As the anger subsided, Dia came to and what she said became clear. With a fierce blush, she looked forward toward the closed student council room door. She'd lost track of time, and couldn't believe how much she'd bared. It was long overdue for Chika to understand all this, but she feared pressing forward. What would Chika? What would happen to a friendship that she hoped would last forever? For a relationship that she'd hoped would lead to something more?

"Thank you." It was said just loud enough as Chika sniffled and rubbed at her eyes, stopping tears before they could form. "But everyone else shines even brighter than me. I'm so lucky to be in a group with the most amazing people in the world, and you're like the most amazing of all of them Dia."

"That's certainly true." More denial. Dia didn't look over as she shifted and straightened her back. "But I think that when we're all on stage, and the lights are on us, you stand out more than anyone else could. Even when the lights turn off, and we need to find the determination to keep going, you turn into a star that all eight of us can follow behind. Yes, Aqours is made up of nine special girls, but only of them could have started this, and that's you, Chika. I know it's hard for you to see that, but nobody else could do what you've done, and shine as bright as you do."

Chika's bangs fell over her eyes as she leaned forward. The tears didn't streak down her face, instead falling in little droplets down onto her knees. She inched her chair in closer to Dia's but didn't dare lean in.

As all of her pent-up feelings flowed, Dia's vision had blurred. Though she wouldn't let her tears fall, it wasn't her moment for that. As Chika's chair squeaked upon the floor, her mind raced with no solid idea of what to do. Spilling how she felt was tough enough, comforting was not part the equation as the frustrations took over earlier.

"Do I really shine like that?" Chika put her forehead on Dia's shoulder, never once looking up to show the tears.

Dia reached across her body, running stiff fingers through Chika's hair. "Brighter than anyone else."

"Thanks."

A stack of papers over an inch tall still sat uncompleted on the table. Dia would have to work late to finish most of them in time. Which meant tomorrow the room would be filled the usual Kanan and Mari. Some clubs might raise a fuss about requests not being met with Dia's usual punctuality, but that didn't matter.

Chika sniffled and Dia kept her hand running through orange hair. The clock behind Dia ticked on, but she wouldn't look back. She'd stay as long as Chika needed her. Whether that was ten minutes, ten hours, or ten years, Dia didn't care.


End file.
